.png "Ashraf, his niece Areej, and his sister Dina with her daughter Areej")
I don’t really know why Ashraf and I connected so easily and quickly when we first met, but for whatever reason, we did. I think it might have been the gentle way he reached out to me for guidance and advice; his kind nature touched my heart. He knew I was someone he could trust because of my friendship with one of his cousins, another dear friend in Gaza, and I quickly learned Ashraf was someone I could trust too. Ashraf, his sister Dina, (who I met through him), and his cousin, (who I also hope to tell you more about later)
, are all very important to me. I am honored to be friends with them, to care about them, and to know them.
Ashraf is the middle child in a family with brothers and sisters on either side. He worries a lot about his parents and his sisters' children. He feels responsible for all of them. He is the primary contact for his family and extended family of 18 people–adults, children, and elders– and he has been trying as hard as he can to raise enough support for them, which has not been easy.
Before October 2023, Ashraf had gone to school for accounting and he had had his own store; he had been a business owner and his business had done well. He was proud of his work, and he misses his independence and the security he found through his career. Ashraf loved the life he had been building for himself, and he had many interests and hobbies and things he enjoyed doing. But it is hard for him to think about these things now when every moment is focused on survival.
Ashraf possesses a sincerity and a quiet strength that resonates with my heart, and his gentle sweetness and caring nature are clear in everything he says and does. Self-promotion is not something he knows how to devote himself to with comfort or ease, and using social media to grow a supportive base is not something that has come easily. Support garnered through social media interactions has not generated enough for his family, and they have been struggling greatly. I have been trying to help since the first moment we met, but finding support for Ashraf and his family through online connections has been difficult.
Currently, most of Ashraf’s support comes from my local community, from people who have gotten to know him and his family through conversations with me and
presentations I have given. This base has made a huge difference in his family’s life, but we urgently need to expand it and are still seeking more help with this.
I often think about how unjust it is that people who have already experienced so much loss and injustice are put in the position of having to fundraise for their survival. And yet, without the funds raised through mutual aid and crowdfunding, things would be even worse, because there has been nothing else providing support.
Ashraf is another friend who has changed my life forever. Once, when I asked him to tell me something he liked about himself, he told me that he liked that he is helpful --that being helpful to others is one of his favorite things. And I recognize the truth of this. Ashraf has a beautiful and poetic soul, which is evident in the way he speaks and communicates. His words reflect his compassionate nature, a strength that also makes him vulnerable to experiencing feelings on a very deep emotional and physical level. He is highly sensitive and empathetic, and one of the hardest things for him has been to see others suffering while not being able to alleviate their pain.
When we first met, before the so-called ceasefire this past winter, and up until recently, Ashraf and I used to talk often, almost every day, and it was through these many conversations I grew to care more and more about him, and our friendship quickly expanded. Lately it is rare for me to hear from him directly, and I miss him terribly. Thankfully, his sister Dina will check in with me whenever she can, and every time I hear from her my gratitude towards them only increases, as I know it is not easy to stay connected and to endure.
During our last conversation many weeks ago now, Ashraf explained to me how he and his family are very tired, and he spoke about how this life is taking a toll–this constant daily struggle for basic needs and survival amidst incessant danger. People are too tired to even hope for change, and uncertainty has become as constant as the presence of death and danger.
It has become very hard for Ashraf and his family to hold on to hope, and I understand this. Hope takes energy and effort. And starvation and constant loss and trauma are not things that make this easy. Staying connected to those of us outside Gaza who are trying to offer support helps, but his phone was stolen and obtaining a new one is difficult and expensive. Not having a phone has increased Ashraf’s sense of isolation, as phones are a lifeline for families in Gaza, helping them find and access both emotional and material support. I keep hoping we will come across a generous donor with the means to offer enough for Ashraf to be able to purchase a new phone, but as food and medicine come first, it would require either a significant generous donation, or substantial growth in sustained support.
Ashraf’s lovely sister Dina is as sweet and kind as her dear brother, and whenever we speak, her primary focus is always on her daughter, Areej. Dina is smart and bright, a beautiful mother who cares strongly about her child and her family. She wants Areej to have everything she needs, and it hurts her to see her daughter suffer.
Dina and her husband are both loving parents struggling to survive because of the great injustices done to them. They miss the beautiful life they had been creating for themselves, and mourn the chance they had to pursue their dreams. Now their every moment is focused on trying to survive, trying to find food, water, and medicine, and trying to live amidst unending violence and danger.
As Dina once explained to me:
“Oh how I wish for life…Or for life to come back to us. We have become very tired. No one knows how much we need life. I want to work with my degree. To manage my life and my time. To live my motherhood like the rest of the world. What is this that we are in? We were comfortable in our life, but unfortunately everything was destroyed, and I still haven't grasped this. My degrees, my home, my clothes, my precious jobs, my memories. This is painful, very painful. I am a business administration graduate and I dreamed of building my own business. But today I dream of building my life from scratch.”Ashraf and Dina each have their own survival campaigns, which is also a place where I will post updates about their situation, written in collaboration with them. Currently, they are both in urgent need of more emergency support for themselves and their families, as the violence in Gaza City is expanding exponentially, and conditions have only grown increasingly dire.
Today I write in an attempt to introduce you to them, to ask you to care about them and their families, and to request you give them whatever support you can. They are facing yet another
violent forced displacement, and they do not have any options or resources. Whatever we can give them now will help them survive, and will also demonstrate to them that they are not alone, despite having been abandoned and betrayed by the many international governance structures and institutions that claim to uphold human rights.
I also write to thank those of you who are already supporting Ashraf and Dina and their families, to remind you again that what you are doing is helping, and to ask you to please continue. There are many in my community who are trying to fundraise, donating their time and their money whenever they can, and without those efforts, things would be even worse. And so again I will say even though what we have been doing is not enough, it is helping. And it is needed. And we must keep trying to build on the support we have, and to do all we can to help these families survive.
Below are the links to their survival campaigns, where you can donate to them directly online, and you also have the option of signing up to become a regular donor with a sustaining weekly or monthly contribution.
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.jpg "Eight Families in Gaza")
.png "Ashraf, his niece Areej, and his sister Dina with her daughter Areej")
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